Monday: Yin, Paint, Yang; Tuesday: Hot Yang, Gardening, Babytime, DIAPERS, Bodywork, Painting, Yin, Great Food; Wednesday: Yoga, and more Yoga, and Beach; Thursday: Nutritionist Dream, Yin, Processing/Therapy Session, Nap and Water Dream.
This week has been full of blessings, about 2 weeks ago, I came to a full realization how I was blocking myself from moving forward in the avenues of life I choose to help/serve other people in. Stepping out of this imposter syndrome, that I have stood in since a child (due to traumas), the oppurtunities of my dreams have been opening up. It brings tears to my eyes seeing God lay the beautiful plan infront of me and to be able to walk the road with courage, trust, faith, love, and honor. Fore these ways are my soul purpose, I feel it whole heartedly. I've been receiving affirmation and recognition of my path through music, experiences, opportunities, dreams, really in everyway possible, I have been open to seeing it/feeling it. So much of this has come with really focusing on my yoga practice, giving this time to myself, and really being able to sit in the experience. In making this promise to myself, honestly I started when thinking I would develop classes, where now I see it may just be for my own growth. Other oppurtunities for work, where I feel very called have come up, in areas of bodywork, and the most recent and where I feel most connected, stepping up as a therapist/mentor/life coach. People I spend time with have always told me that time with me feels like a therapy session, and that I offer a new perspective that really makes sense and opens doors to what may have been unseen.
This week I was confronted about a friend with what may be looked at as a physical ailment to others and I offered her the perspective that these physical ailments are caused by deeper rooted emotional/mental patterns. She came back and said, "Now I feel like I need a therapist." I talked with Travis a little and he made me really feel (what I had been feeling) that I was the one for this job. With some hesitation, I messaged back and offered to help her. Her response was something along the lines of, "Yes Please, I would see no one better fit for the job. Id love to pay you for your time too." I was ecstatic, I've always dreamed of serving others in this way, I just never knew how to step into the position. Here I had imposter syndrome because I haven't gone to school for any kind of psych work, I also feel that what I would learn there is information I don't need. I am gifted with this and have learned so much that deals with actual healing, I now realize that the oppurtunity has obly come because i have the capability, knowing, and skill for this. Through many other avenues, my patience, my ability to truly hear what people are saying, to read situations, and to see patterns through and through are some of the things I have been gifted with. I felt so connected, and in the right place during today's session. This is the mentorship I have been seeking to share, and it has found me.
After this session, Travis and I took a little nap and I had a dream. In this dream, I was at a friend's house that I had been at before and as we walked in I realized that there were huge leaks coming from the laundry room. I went in and started to stop the leak in there, as I stopped that leak other leaks started to pop up. I helped to stop all the leaks and then we made our way upstairs to check the final spot where there was water running through, as I walked in there I mentioned to my friend about how I had help to stop the leak in the bathtub up in this Grand bathroom. There was a man in there showing me the tub, he remembered me helping them stop that leak, and mentioned how wonderful that then they got this amazing bathtub out of it. Someone then was mentioning to me how women are like the banks of a river, we control the way the water flows, the water being representative of emotion as well, connection to our sacral chakra. They then said to me that I have a gift of rebuilding these Banks, in this rebuilding the way that women control our emotions. The men then being like the water, able to flow freely with their emotions in control without having to really focus on them. I found this dream really timely after today's conversation and meeting. And then Rose to a beautiful storm coming through, the rain washing down and over us all and all the land.
Dreams are really powerful and speak to us deeply. Water dreams are highly connected to our emotions, our emotional state, our feelings, our relationships, our passions, our creativity, really everything that the sacral chakra governs over. I've been having very vivid dreams, ones of me offering great help to the people around me. Last night I had a dream that I was at a carnival here in Florida and Matt Semi (UFC Fighter I mentioned) had to Booth set up with some other people that we went to high school with. I was walking by and turned around and yelled hi, they looked at me weird and I continued walking. A few of them then started to follow and it seem like they were closing things up, so that I didn't go back. I then turned around and told them who I was, and all those doors that had been closed, opened. We then chatted, they told me they were about to order food and invited me to eat with them. I took the offer and then got in some van with them to go get food. While in the van we started talking nutrition, they realize that I had a good sense of what I was talking about, Matt had mentioned going vegan, trying to dial in his diet, and I said I didn't think that was a good idea being a fighter. I asked him if he knew Weston A . Price and his values, he said he had just heard of him and had started to do some research. So I offered my knowledge, and he ended up asking if him and his buddies could stay on the farm with Travis and I. We welcomed them, telling them that all we really had to offer was tent space, they were down. They enjoyed the knowledge being shared, I knew that training could still continue, as well as some added yoga, body work, and other therapies.
There are many ways that I know I'm here to help. I realize that patiently waiting will bring those who are truly seeking the help I have to offer, and those people are truly grateful for the knowledge that I have.
The other day I was coming home from a friend's after a yoga class and as I walked into the stair case there was a large toad, and as I got to the top of frog fell on my head, then on to the stairs. This frog was eating a lizard. The lizard / reptilian Brain is the state of being in fight or flight. I saw this situation as now stepping into this frog space, where frogs are extremely transcendent. They take huge jumps and are known as highly spiritual beings.
I am moving to the next level, away from fear, into full trust, and love. I know I am on the right path. I thank baby everyday for offering this to me as well, I know that this pregnancy is easing me to knew heights, as I step into my true purpose in so many avenues of life.
Thank you for reading, hearing my stories,
I love you,
Samantha
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